There is a strange perception amongst those of us serving on the parental battlefield that the more you reproduce, the more competent a parent you are.
It’s as if your offspring act as additional soldiers joining the troop and you become stronger as a unit - ploughing on through life like the calvary galloping towards war, flags raised.
Please humour me for a moment whilst I totally shatter that illusion.
Allow me to reassure you, although we may have occasional delusions of being great leaders of a band of warriors bred from our loins (delusions arising mainly because we are so bloody tired from thrice as many night-time get ups as first time round), we are actually more like ring leaders of a circus.
A circus wherein the elephants keep wandering off in different directions, one of the acrobats has developed a serious attitude problem and we get a little cocky on opening night with safety procedures and end up being eaten by the lion.
The problem with children is that they are human beings.