A year into the coronavirus pandemic, the way we work has radically changed. As masks, social distancing and remote jobs have become the new normal, your career ambitions may have shifted, too.Many people are choosing to “shelter” at their current jobs during the pandemic, even if they want to leave them, according to a January LinkedIn survey. Top reasons people gave for staying in their jobs right now include collecting a steady income and keeping finances stable (59%), taking advantage of company benefits (30%), wanting to wait out the pandemic for a more favourable job market (15%) and having no time or energy to focus on a job switch (14%). “I think there is hesitation about coming into a new situation where you’re not going to be able to onboard in person, the risk that it might not be a good fit, and that tends to make people more cautious,” George Anders, author of the LinkedIn report, told HuffPost. “You get a group of people who are going, ‘This may be what I need to make peace with right now.’”The survey follows June research from Deloitte that found the number of millennials who anticipate changing jobs in the next two years has dropped from 49% in 2019 to 31% in 2020. The millennials surveyed cited the need for stability as their reason for not leaving their current positions.When survival is the focus, hunting for a better opportunity gets tabled.Cicely Horsham-Brathwaite, a licensed psychologist and executive coach, said she has seen this shift in needs in her own clients.“Part of it is that people are so stressed that the thought of going through a job search, going to another company that is unknown, is scary,” she said. “People’s survival needs around making sure that you have the income you need to sustain your life is very much the focus.”This is true for Rachael, an educational administrator who oversees K-12 schools in New York City. Prior to the pandemic, Rachael was denied a raise and felt like she couldn’t grow at her workplace.“The culture for someone like me, an African American woman interviewing for a position ... it wasn’t easy. It hasn’t been easy. That was one of the reasons besides [not getting a raise] that I was really willing to go somewhere and have peace of mind and be able to grow,” said Rachael, who asked for her full name to be withheld due to concerns of career reprisal.But then Covid-19 hit New York City, and Rachael’s plans to look for a new job changed.“Instead of me looking for the job that I’ve always wanted, for security reasons I definitely decided to make sure that my family and I are taken care of,” she said. “In the beginning in New York City, there were ... a lot of people getting laid off. Being in a job that is unionised is the best place to be right now.”Right now, the goal of saving for a house keeps her going at work.“What I’m getting out of this is ensuring that I get the house of my dreams, and that’s what motivates me to wake up in the morning,” she said.Her company benefits, such as access to therapy and the ability to work remotely, have helped, too.“If I didn’t have those benefits, maybe I wouldn’t be able to cope, I wouldn’t be able to manage the pandemic,” Rachael said, adding that if she were required to go into work every day, “I would really be pushed to continue my journey in looking elsewhere to save my livelihood, to save my life.”What to do if you want to leave your job but can’t during the pandemic.1. Plan ahead for your next career move. Be proactive about laying the groundwork for your next job, even if you don’t think you can leave your current one right now. Brush up your CV and cover letter, and network with others who have the careers you want so that when you are ready to job hunt, you can hit the ground running.Rachael said that people who are not in their ideal jobs should ask themselves who they are, where they want to be and what their strengths are.“For me, my thought was, ‘Life is short. What do you want your legacy to be? And where do you want to invest your time?’” Rachael said.2. Don’t compare yourself to who you were professionally before the pandemic. But do adjust and experiment with what works. Reset your definition of what good work means during a pandemic. Sometimes, that means accepting “good enough” as your new job standard.“We are all, to some degree, working with at least one hand tied behind our backs,” licensed psychologist Kristin Bianchi previously told HuffPost. “We can’t judge ourselves based on what we were able to do pre-pandemic, before physical distancing restrictions were put into place.”It’s not useful to push yourself beyond what you’re capable of, but Horsham-Brathwaite suggested doing periodic check-ins with yourself to see if your current level of disengagement needs to continue or if you can give a little bit more.3. Understand that complete detachment can be a sign of deeper issues and focus on finding fulfilment elsewhere. Loss of interest in the world around you is a sign of burnout and depression. If you are coasting through your job with no sense of meaning or engagement at all, Horsham-Brathwaite said, recognise that you may be missing out on feelings that contribute to an overall sense of wellness and need to seek them elsewhere.“Give yourself permission for enjoyment,” Horsham-Brathwaite said. “Your satisfaction doesn’t just have to come from how you perform in your work.”She suggested doing activities that either supplement your life outside of work by using skills and talents that are already meaningful to you or that help you grow and develop, such as participating in your church or joining clubs.Related...Students Can Now Claim Covid Compensation. Here’s How5 Bits Of Budget News Rishi Sunak Tried To BuryExplained: What 'County Lines' Is And How It Works
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“It was not an easy decision,” says James Smith, 40, a catering manager from Nottingham.“I did keep my distance the whole time. I actually sat in the field for about an hour just thinking and people watching. And for an hour there was no mental issue, no worry or anxiety. I think taking that risk really made a difference.”Smith’s mum and stepdad had recently caught Covid-19 – and he’d been in contact with them. Following government guidelines, he ordered a test and was self-isolating till he heard back. But given his own history with mental health, he decided that going out for a walk was, on balance, the right thing to do.“Knowing that both parents had Covid mentally drained me,” he tells HuffPost UK. “My sister, a single parent to a three-year-old, was in the same situation. My test was negative. But I broke the rule of self isolating until I got my results.”Smith isn’t alone in his rule-breaking – 20,000 people are failing to self-isolate when told to, said Dido Harding, while being questioned by MPs in February.While it feels easy to condemn all those people as selfish and dangerous in their behaviour, such a large figure of ‘rebels’ implies there may be deeper issues  behind the breach of rules, suggests Sophie Scott, psychologist and professor of cognitive neuroscience at University College London. Some breaking their Covid self-isolation are acting out of financial necessity: they need to work. Others may feel compelled for health reasons of their own.“What feels like a necessary reason to go outside can be different for different people, and people’s experiences of mental health might affect this sense of what is necessary,” says Scott.“I think it’s a bit too easy to judge other people. No one would justify unsafe behaviour, and obviously we all should be obeying the rules for lockdown and not making unnecessary trips outside, but what is ‘necessary’ is not always a cut and dried question with a clear answer.”Jenny*, 29, a health worker based in London, felt similarly to Smith when it came to breaking self-isolation rules in order to maintain her mental health.Her flatmate recently tested positive for Covid-19 and although their house of six distanced as best they could for the next 10 days, Jenny still went out daily when, technically, she should not have left the house at all. “Despite fastidiously sticking to precautions in the house, I did not consider the possibility of not leaving the house once a day to go for a run,” she tells HuffPost UK.“Later, I spoke with friends who were surprised I’d casually continued running throughout my self-isolation period. I wondered whether what I had done was extremely selfish, but the more I thought about it the more certain I was that I’d done what I needed to do.”Jenny has a history of depression and ADHD. “Despite taking antidepressants and ADHD medication, by far the most important factor in managing my conditions is daily, intensive exercise,” she says. “I would simply not be able to stay in my room for 10 days without going outdoors to exercise. It’s exactly the kind of situation that would drive me to engage in addictive behaviours as the need to self-stimulate became increasingly desperate.”Ivana Poku, a life coach for new mums, reports that some of her clients have broken government-enforced Covid self-isolation for their mental health, too.“I know from both personal and professional experience the negative impact long-term isolation can have on mental wellbeing,” says Poku.“Getting out for exercise helps maintain good mental health and is essential, especially for those who struggle with mental health issues. While I understand that safety comes first, we also need to be responsible with our health.”There is also the phenomenon of social cohesion, says Scott. “The more people appear to break the rules, the more likely it is that other people will join in.”Scott acknowledges self-isolation is a challenge for those who can’t work from home or don’t get paid leave, and may be facing financial or job precarity. “Work and anxiety and money concerns feed into this,” she says, “along with, I suspect, a slight lack of the sheer terror and novelty of the first lockdown.There is “good evidence”, she adds from behavioural science, that people can sometimes themselves a pass for activities they would judge more harshly in others – “along the lines of it’s OK when I do it, but a problem when someone else does.”As measures look set to ease in the coming weeks and conversation shifts to ‘unlockdown’ and how we head into a more social spring and summer, safeguarding the nation’s physical and mental health remains paramount. Virologists stress that Covid-19 will be with us for months, maybe years, to come. Given the infectious and mutating nature of the virus and the emergence of new variants, periods of self-isolation will continue to be necessary for anyone exposed to it, as well as the physically vulnerable and shielding.Some of these people may be mentally vulnerable, too. It’s not too late to begin a new narrative around self-care in the pandemic: one that refuses to allow quick judgement of others and their actions and recognises that, for many people, the idea of being trapped in a bedroom, house, or simply inside for 10 days straight, is enough to seriously compromise their health.*Some names have been changed to offer anonymity. Useful websites and helplinesMind, open Monday to Friday, 9am-6pm on 0300 123 3393.Samaritans offers a listening service which is open 24 hours a day, on 116 123 (UK and ROI - this number is FREE to call and will not appear on your phone bill).CALM (the Campaign Against Living Miserably) offer a helpline open 5pm-midnight, 365 days a year, on 0800 58 58 58, and a webchat service.The Mix is a free support service for people under 25. Call 0808 808 4994 or email [email protected] Mental Illness offers practical help through its advice line which can be reached on 0808 801 0525 (Monday to Friday 10am-4pm). More info can be found on rethink.org.Related...It's Normal To Want More And Less Lockdown At The Same Time'The Washing Up Argument Gets Louder': This Is House Share Life In LockdownThe Mystery Of The Covid Deaths Taking Months To Appear In NHS DataIt's Not Just You. A Lot Of Us Are Hitting A Pandemic Wall Right NowMarch Is Here! These 7 Cheerful Things Are Keeping Us Going
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When schools reopen on March 8, face masks will be more prevalent than ever  before.Secondary school pupils will have to wear masks in classrooms during lessons “unless social distancing can be maintained”. In fact, they’ll be required to wear masks “in all indoor environments” for the rest of term, with P.E being one of the few exemptions. In primary schools, however, pupils aren’t required to wear them – but staff will. The World Health Organisation (WHO) recommends mask-wearing for all over 12s, and says masks should be considered for 6-11 year olds in some circumstances.Children in the latter age group may need to wear masks if “there is widespread transmission in the area where the child resides”, says the WHO. So, does the UK school policy go far enough? We spoke to the experts to find out. Dr Julian Tang, a consultant virologist and expert in respiratory sciences at the University of Leicester, says it would help reduce virus transmission if all children wore face masks, particularly as schools reopen. “Children have been doing this in other Western countries – including France and the United States – in preparation for schools reopening,” he tells HuffPost UK. “Southeast Asian countries who experienced SARS 2003 – so have grown up in this masking culture – have been doing this all year.”Studies have indicated that universal mask wearing (in countries such as Taiwan, Vietnam, Thailand, Hong Kong) contributes to the effective control of this virus, Dr Tang adds. “This will apply to the new variants also, as lab-based studies have shown that universal masking reduces overall virus shedding (using influenza virus) from the source as well as exposure to the recipient,” he says. If all children wore masks when returning to UK schools, it could “prevent the rapid close-range aerosol transmission during normal conversation that kids always have,” Dr Tang says. He recommends mask wearing alongside other measures, such as opening  windows – “to improve ventilation and reduce overall airborne virus concentration” – and keeping class sizes small – “to reduce crowding and improve social distancing”. But transmission prevention is only half the story. The health implications need to be balanced against the emotional and developmental risks of requiring children to wear masks, says child psychologist Dr Amanda Gummer. “Young children may not understand why they need to wear masks and so may be confused,” she says.Mask wearing could be turned into a game to help some children “process it without too much difficulty”, but this wouldn’t help all children.“For young children who have difficulty interpreting social and emotional cues, they are likely to be further disadvantaged as facial expressions form a large part of non-verbal communication,” she explains.“Children who are hard of hearing will also not be able to lip read and those who are shy and struggle to speak out may have their contributions to discussions missed, as no one will know they are trying to talk if they don’t see their mouths moving. Children who mumble will miss out on opportunities to speak out.”Dr Tang agrees the potential emotional implications of young children wearing masks in the UK should not be overlooked. “This is really a cultural thing,” he says. “Southeast Asian children have grown up with this culture since SARS 2003, so are more familiar with it and can adapt to it easier and better, just like using chopsticks versus knife and forks.”Older children are more able to understand the science behind mask-wearing, so Dr Gummer expects most secondary school pupils will be able to cope with wearing them. “The important thing for the older children is that they’re able to spend time with their friends,” she says. “If they need to wear a mask, most of them will accept that. Again, there’s a potential issue with shy children getting over-looked more, but I’d expect this to be less of an issue than in the younger age group. ”Epidemiologically, it’s also more vital for older students to protect themselves and their peers from the virus, adds Dr Tang, so it’s a good thing mask-wearing has been extended in secondary schools. “Secondary school children are more like adults,” he says. “They’re at higher risk of both transmitting and acquiring SARS-COV-2 infection and are also at risk of more severe Covid-19 disease due to their older age.”Children of all ages have also been found to be affected by long Covid – which is something else to consider if you’re debating buying a mask for your child. Ultimately, though, the government states children in primary school don’t need to wear a face covering. In other settings, while the Department of Health and Social Care (DHSC) advises that children under the age of 11 don’t need to wear face masks, whether they do or not is ultimately up to parents.Related...How To Prepare Your Kids Now They're Going Back To SchoolWe've Been Told To Open Our Windows This Winter. Here's WhyHow To Prepare Your Kids Now They're Going Back To School‘A 6-Year-Old In A 90-Year-Old’s Body’ – The Children Devastated By Long Covid'I Lock Myself In The Loo' – The Claustrophobia Of Parenting Right NowCreate A Mental Health Shelf – And 8 Other Tips To Calm Anxious Kids
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Disagreeing with co-workers is inevitable in any job. It’s normal and even encouraged in some situations to clash with colleagues in order to get the best work done. But not all of us have the right tools to do it thoughtfully. Some of us can get aggressive, manipulative or all too silent.How people work through conflict reflects a foundational choice in their priorities, said Lawrese Brown, founder of C-Track Training, a workplace education company. “Our approach to conflict has to also do with whether or not we are looking to protect a relationship, or we’re looking to secure the result,” Brown told HuffPost.No single approach to conflict is inherently best. Your preferred arguing style may have advantages that make you successful at your job, but it could also lead you to alienate the people around you or even undermine your career. See which conflict style fits you best:1) The CompetitorCompetitors have an “assertive and uncooperative” arguing style, according to behavioural scientists Kenneth Thomas and Ralph Kilmann, developers of a well-known conflict resolution assessment tool.For example, competitors may one-up their colleagues and frame others’ ideas as their own to get ahead, even if it hurts personal relationships, Brown said.“They get into conflict, and it’s like ‘This is me or you,’” she said. “What’s helpful is that you’re going to get someone who is forthright. What’s not helpful is that in their assertiveness and often in their aggressiveness, there is a dominance they have over other people.”As a result, co-workers may give in to competitors because they feel there is no room to negotiate. Competitors may think, “I’m getting the results I want, and I’m doing well at my job,” but their conflict style can sacrifice working relationships, which are critical to making ideas happen.“Any way you could avoid working with that person in the future, unless you absolutely have to, you will,” Brown said.If this style describes you, Brown suggests asking yourself, “Is there a better solution here than the one I’m suggesting? Someone may have a better idea to get to the outcome.”2) The CollaboratorCollaborators aim to reach a consensus. “People feel heard, which is great. Everyone’s ideas are taken into account,” Brown said.However, she cautioned against idealising collaboration as the best mode of conflict. At their worst, collaborators can become manipulative. Because they want everyone to feel as if they’ve won, collaborators may not be transparent about the realities of how everyone’s input will be used, or the budget or resource constraints involved.When you are a collaborator, you may make promises you cannot keep, and that ultimately breaks people’s trust.“Usually, agreeing but then not committing means you still aren’t really getting your way. You are just causing a delay in whatever this thing is that you are either railing against, or the thing you really want to see happen,” said Lara Hogan, author of “Resilient Management” and co-founder of the management consulting company Wherewithall.Collaborators should ask themselves if they are really setting an appropriate expectation or if they just want to see others accept the outcome the collaborator wants but hasn’t shared, Brown said.3) The AccommodatorAccommodators are willing to sacrifice or minimise their own needs to get through conflicts. As a result, colleagues feel supported by them, even when arguing. But accommodators can become pushovers if they become too obliging, as Brown talks about in her e-book “A Guide To Self-Advocacy,” in which she outlines this conflict style.“Accommodating relies on continuously yielding to others, but others’ appreciation of you for carrying more than your fair share can transform into an expectation that you always do more than required,” she writes.If you find yourself accommodating too much to get through conflict, try saying, “That doesn’t work for me,” Brown advises in her e-book, writing, “This phrase prevents you from saying an outright no, and allows others to consider how you’re being slighted in the solution.”4) The DealmakerDealmakers will bargain to get results. They concentrate less on amplifying what’s possible and more focused on using transactions to get through conflicts. At heart, they are compromisers who think along the lines of, “Here’s what I have. Here’s what I know you have. Neither of us can get exactly what we want, so where can we meet in the middle? This needs to get done,” Brown said.At their worst, dealmakers’ drive to reach a conclusion may prompt them to be less than honest about what any concessions mean in the long term, such as “30 days from now, we’re going to double your workload,” Brown said.If you’re arguing with a dealmaker, make sure to read the fine print on their offers.5) The Up-And-Over ArguerPeople with this personality type do not address conflicts directly with a colleague. Instead, they go above them to someone with more power, Hogan said. Hogan said up-and-over arguers may be motivated by the belief that raising problems to superiors will gain them clout and power. Sometimes, they’re motivated by urgency.“They just want to get this problem solved right away,” Hogan said. “They think that getting a person with more power involved will get them a speedier resolution.“No one enjoys finding out that a co-worker has gone behind their back, though. This tactic breaks down trust between colleagues and often backfires. There are obviously instances in which escalation is warranted, such as a toxic office environment, “but usually, the up-and-over does not get you your desired outcome,” Hogan said. “It just drags it out and involves people with much more power that shouldn’t be spending time on your disagreement.”6) The Conflict-Avoidant ArguerAt best, a conflict-avoidant arguer protects working relationships through their ability to let conflicts go. “On one hand, you can say that they minimise, but these are also people who will say, ‘OK that’s not a big deal.’ Sometimes in work environments, that’s a helpful attitude to take,” Brown said.But their unwillingness to engage also means their valuable input is never heard.“I often see people avoid conflict in the workplace either because they believe it will cause more problems ― which, to be honest, it can ― [or] due to a lack of investment in the situation,“ Cicely Horsham-Brathwaite, a psychologist and executive coach, told HuffPost. “However, there are times where your contribution and your voice need to be heard to help shift the thinking or enhance the perspective.”There is no assertiveness in avoidance. “You ever heard of someone who are like, ‘I was thinking something, but I didn’t say it’? These are those people,” Brown said. Sometimes, avoidance may look like silence when a work conflict arises. “They are looking for an escape route. They are just shutting down entirely,” Hogan said.If you find yourself in conflict with someone who is disengaging from the argument, ask questions to identify what they need so you can start to move forward.7) The Devil’s AdvocateColleagues who play devil’s advocate usually argue against a position merely for the sake of argument and not in good faith.“They might come up with fake examples, lots of hypotheticals, lots of what-if statements that really aren’t related to what you’re talking about or don’t have any applications in the real world,” Hogan said. “Sometimes it’s a time-waster, but often it’s just this person hasn’t figured out why they don’t agree with what’s happening.”If you find yourself talking in circles with a devil’s advocate, ask them something like, “It’s clear that our current agreement doesn’t feel satisfactory, or you’re not on board with it yet. What’s going on underneath that?” Hogan said.That way, you give them the time and space to reflect on barriers they may have but have yet to articulate.Related...These New 'Second Class Citizen' Stamps Send A Powerful MessageNasal Sprays Are Part Of The Fight Against Covid-19. Here's HowIs It Better To Have Sex In The Morning Or At Night?
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Mental health is an important concern, especially during a raging global pandemic.People are forced to stay indoors, limit their interactions with loved ones, and face all manner of uncertainties on their own.
Amanda Kusek recently inspired me all they way from her garden in New York to my own grotty London lockdown setup, when she conveyed a thought I’d been nursing privately for a while.“This year my theme is DREAM BIGGER,” Kusek posted under a photo of herself in a jumper with FUCK OFF written right across it. “I noticed over the past couple of years my goals have become too reasonable,” the 33-year-old account manager wrote. “So, for 2021, I’m done being reasonable.”Now, I’d love to write an article that didn’t mention the pandemic, but let’s face it, if ever big dreams were having a rough ride, it’s right now. Unsure what’s happening tomorrow, next week or next month, we are living in a state of infinite present. And this low-level stress means most of us are struggling to make plans for dinner, let alone our lives. View this post on InstagramA post shared by Poet | Storyteller | NYC (@cheapcourage)“Dreaming big may seem distant and unrealistic given our environment,” says psychologist Dr Jill Bond. But for Kusek, the pandemic had the opposite effect.“I was forced to slow down and reflect in a way that I have typically avoided,” she tells me. “This experience shifted my thinking heading into the new year and I wanted to try setting a theme.” It also made her realise how much much her perspective had changed since childhood. “I recalled memories of great big, beautiful dreams I had as a child and I missed that feeling. Realistic dreams aren’t dreams – they’re a to-do list!”Pandemic or no pandemic (let it soon be the latter!), losing the ability to “dream big” is a feeling I can relate to. As more of my friends settle down into families and develop stronger personal ties, I’ve been left wondering what my version of life looks like if it’s different to theirs and I’m not the only one having a rethink.When Thuva Amuthan’s final medical exams were halted by the pandemic last year, the stress gave him pause for thought and the 29-year-old doctor from Birmingham began pondering if his big dreams were even the right ones. “Do I really want to neglect my health in my best years working crazy hours relentlessly, only to play catch-up later, if that is even possible?” he asked.Looking more closely at the cost – financial and emotional – of his current commitments and how they affected his work-life balance, Amuthan realised the setback was a chance to “really unpick my priorities and what I want from life”. Given the right headspace, could this pandemic actually be a good time not only to think about, but potentially action, our biggest hopes and dreams? Jessica Chivers is a coaching psychologist and founder of Comeback Community, a digital resource for people returning from any sort of leave – parental, sickness, bereavement. She agrees that going through a stressful period can sometimes help people work out what really matters to them. While differences in our individual make-up mean this isn’t going to work for everyone, some people find themselves fuelled by uncertainty, she says. “Putting one person in a state of distress, not able to attain the things that they usually have, can generate huge feelings of, ‘Right, I’ve got to solve this, let’s get creative and think big,’” Chivers explains. “We hear many entrepreneurial stories coming from really difficult situations.”Amuthan, who arrived in the UK as a refugee in childhood, believes that encountering difficult situations in the past has only spurred him along.“Growing up in a council house and leading a single parent household at a young age, adversity has never fazed me,” he says. “I have particularly enjoyed proving wrong those who say, ‘Ooh that’s impossible/mad!’ – from getting into medical school to many of the other things I have achieved.” Perhaps it’s no surprise how he’s responded to these latest obstacles, then, no matter whether he ends up doubling down on his medical dreams – or finding new ones.Some shifts are smaller, but no less significant. For Amber Leach, 39, a wedding photographer based in Devon, the past year has triggered a fight or flight response that’s reset her priorities while also focusing her ambitions.“I was in a rut, hoping things would get better within the wedding industry and then I realised I couldn’t keep hoping and waiting,” says Leach. With weddings off, Leach started “dreaming in a different direction”. The pandemic showed her she had been overworking. “I realised my family is the most important thing to me in the world! Nothing comes in the way of my time with them,” she says.Now, while weddings still aren’t possible, she’s still developing her career by working on elements of growth that are within her control. “I have spent my extra time rebranding my business, building a new website and working on my marketing strategy. The current climate has given me courage to try completely new ideas that I would never have had the time to do,” she says.For me, the big dreams aren’t professional so much as personal and a matter of geography. I can’t stop thinking how I’d like to move abroad, but I’d also get into a relationship. The weirdness of lockdown ennui has definitely spurred both trains of thought on. I count myself lucky as someone predisposed to thinking beyond the end of the day, but that’s not to say I find those days any less hard.There are people, of course, for whom dreaming big is blocked by the very real struggles of getting food on the table, caring for children or other dependents, and stabilising their own mental health in hugely challenging times like these. And even for those of us with the relative freedom to daydream, the flights of fancy can be irregular and unpredictable. Pandemic preoccupations easily take over. As Leach says of her current headspace: “It is pretty tough. I am usually a goal setter and planner but I am finding it hard to plan long term.” So, how can we get our “big dream” juice flowing? If nothing else, the pandemic has offered us time for introspection, good or bad. “This is not quick fix territory; this is thinking about things over the longer term,” warns Chivers, who suggests setting some time aside to work out, in the truest sense, what you really want.“Sometimes big questions need to sit and marinade at the back of our minds,” she expands. “And when I say the back of our minds, we’ve kind of put them there. That thought won’t rise up unless we’ve said, ‘I want to consider this question, I want to think about this.’” Positive external stimuli can be a good way to arouse your intrigue if you aren’t in natural dreaming/planning mode during lockdown. “Listen to stories of how other people have achieved something, how other people have overcome difficulties,” says Chivers, who recommends the podcasts How I Built This and Conversations of Inspiration. Time away from Zoom, phone calls and other day-to-day stresses, whether that’s paid work or emotional labour, is key, she adds – “not carrying a cognitive workload so your mind has the ability to be free.”Remember there is light at the end of a vaccine vial. “We can see the global pandemic will have an end at some point in the future so it will be possible to gain more control back over your life and your destiny,” reflects Dr Bond of dreaming big. “For people who have lost a lot at this time, these ideas may help them to rethink things and some may even re-evaluate their failures.” Dreaming big can mean “failing time after time”, she adds. “It is a cliché, but often, as a result, people come back stronger and more able to see their real dreams.”Ultimately, whichever camp you’re in – forced into new ways of living by the pandemic or crying out for change, somehow, without knowing how to get at it – finding ways to think truthfully through what we want will help us escape our current confinement. So, there you have it: don’t beat yourself up if you want to think further than the end of the day right now, but aren’t able to. The first step to being able to dream big might just be overcoming ourselves.Covid-19 is more than a news story – it has changed every aspect of life in the UK. We are following how Britain is experiencing this crisis, the different stages of collective emotion, reaction and resilience. You can tell us how you are feeling and find further advice and resources here.Related...Lockdown May Last Months. Here's Why We Still Need Life PlansHow To Get Your 'Spark' Back If You've Completely Lost Your MojoHow Setting Goals In 2021 Can Help Deal With UncertaintyTry This New Approach To Your Daily Walk. You'll Love Or Hate ItWhy We Feel Constantly Distracted Right Now
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An industrial psychologist explains what makes a good leader - in general, but also in the current crisis situation.
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The modern and fast-paced way of life is leaving no-time for anyone.Every psychologist in Brisbane is agreeing the fact that the cut-throat competition has also become the reason of depression among all generations.The quick, fast, and rapid-paced process of physiotherapy will be checked by a physio in Brisbane in curing every level of mental tension and stress.To understand what is musculoskeletal therapy, visit this website.
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Boris Johnson has unveiled the roadmap out of lockdown – and schools are set to reopen on March 8 as step one.While parents might be breathing a collective sigh of relief, kids might hear the news with mixed emotions – younger children have taken a long time to settle into this new routine, while older children now have Covid testing to contend with alongside the social and educational challenges of returning to class.It’s a lot for someone of any age to take in, so we asked two child psychologists what parents can do to help.   How are children feeling right now? The first step in supporting a child of any age is not to make assumptions about how they might be feeling, says Dr Dan O’Hare, co-chair of the British Psychological Society’s Division for Educational and Child Psychology. “Children’s views and children’s voices have been entirely absent from any government discussion and I think that actually, what they’re doing is seeing children as this homogenous group, and they’re not,” he tells HuffPost UK. “All children have different needs and are different.”There’s an approach called ‘emotional coaching’ in educational psychology, which encourages adults to imagine ourselves in a similar scenario in order to understand how children might be feeling. In this instance, it might be as simple as thinking about how you’d feel going back to work after a long absence. This might bring up feelings of anxiety, relief, excitement, nerves about the unknown, or a mixture of emotions.Children may be eager to see their friends, or they may be worried those friendship dynamics might have changed, says child psychologist Dr Amanda Gummer. Some pupils may also be anxious about what is expected of them “especially with the new testing processes and the social distancing”. Children of any age can struggle to articulate how they’re feeling, but changes of behaviour may best he best indicator that they’re apprehensive about the news. “Children being unusually clingy, picking at their food and not sleeping are all signs that there’s something going on for them,” says Dr Gummer of younger kids. “If it’s school-related, they may clam up when you mention it, or could even try and hide their lunch box or school uniform.”How can you encourage children to open up? The number one thing adults can do to encourage open conversation is something educational psychologists call ‘wondering aloud’, says Dr O’Hare. This involves saying a phrase such as: “I’m wondering if you’re feeling a bit nervous or excited about going back to school?”“Labelling their feelings and just putting it out there can be so powerful,” explains Dr O’Hare, :because a child might say ‘yes, that’s exactly how I’m feeling’, or it gives them a chance to say ‘no, I’m actually really sad because we played loads of games and I’m going to miss you.’ It just opens up the conversation.”With secondary-aged kids, it can help to given them advance warning of the conversation and what you hope to discuss, so it doesn’t feel like an unexpected interrogation. This doesn’t need to be too formal, you can say something like: “Later this week, maybe Friday, we could have a chat about going back to school and how you’re feeling about it?” Open questions are key – “Are you looking forward to going back to school?” is a yes or no question. “Give them time to get their thoughts together and chat to their friends about it,” says Dr O’Hare. Peers are important for older children, so it can be a nice idea to open up the conversation by “externalising”  thoughts in this way. “What does Kayleigh think about it? What does Ahmed think about it, because hasn’t his mum been shielding?” can work where a direct question doesn’t. “Talking about stuff ‘out there’ can sometimes be easier than ‘in here’,” Dr O’Hare adds. How can you help to prepare kids practically ?Encouraging “self-management skills” such as getting themselves dressed and going to the toilet independently will help younger children prepare for the transition to the classroom, says Dr Gummer. “Role playing a school day with your child can really help too,” she adds.Giving a child visual reminders about school can also help ease uncertainty. You can do this by looking at the school’s website together, or sharing resources the teacher has sent home. “Many schools have been sending home images of ‘here’s the new door we’ll be coming in’ and ‘here’s what the classroom looks like now,’” says Dr O’Hare. “This isn’t happening in a vacuum, schools are doing what they do best – responding to the needs of their communities.”It can also help to chat to younger children about their memories of school. Ask them where they line up in the morning, who they stand next to or what colour spot they stand on.“All of those details will make it feel real, rather than this uncertain mystery that’s happening,” says Dr O’Hare. “If children don’t have a really clear sense, they can sometimes fill the blanks with their imagination, and their imagination probably makes things worse than they’re going to be.”  This latter point is also relevant for secondary aged pupils. Try to be truthful with them about new elements of school, such as the testing programme, even if you admit you don’t know all the answers yet. “Talk to them about the challenges they’ve faced during lock down and help them prepare for a shift in friendship dynamics when everyone is back in the same place again,” adds Dr Gummer. Reminding children – whatever their age – that you’re there for them if they think of anything else is also going to make them feel reassured and supported. READ MORE:'Crucial' Or 'Reckless'? What You Need To Know About Schools Reopening In EnglandIn Full: How Boris Johnson Will Lift The Coronavirus LockdownWhen Will We Be Able To See Friends And Family Again?Families Allowed To Travel Across England To Meet Up At Easter
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A big move to a new city. Leaving a relationship that’s run its course. Starting a new job in a completely different field.These big life decisions come with sky-high stress even in the best of times. Throw living through a pandemic into the decision-making process and the stakes seem even higher.Still, nearly a year into the pandemic and various degrees of lockdown, most of us are itching for change of some kind. Why is that? For many people, the pandemic has accentuated problems that already existed, therapists say.If you were sick of being single in before times, the pandemic might have exacerbated your “forever alone”-ness. If you’ve disliked living at home with your parents, even the smallest of studio apartments sounds ultra appealing right now. If you couldn’t deal with your company’s abysmal work-life boundaries, you might be tempted to take a pay cut at nearly any place else to escape.“Before you were able to mask your discontent or it was not as bad when you worked outside of the home, saw friends and were having more pleasure in your life doing other things,” psychotherapist Jennifer Stone tells HuffPost.“Compared to now when we have more limited choices and can’t spend our time differently.”Alexis Bleich, a clinical co-director at Kip Therapy, says many of her clients are thirsty for change, too. The monotony that marks our days now has acted as a big motivator for shaking things up ― but with that comes worries that taking action might be reckless or unwise.However, more often than not, the issues you might have are pretty much in line with what you were wrestling with pre-pandemic. They’re just made much more clear and stark now that we’re all stuck at home, alone with our thoughts.“The fear and frustration of having your life on pause for such a long time can highlight very real concerns, especially for clients who are making decisions that are time sensitive, such as a pregnancy or even going to college,” she said.In New York City, where both Bleich and Stone have offices, quite a few clients have been mulling big life moves. For instance, with rents so high, many are trading city living for the suburbs and the promise of a backyard. (And obviously, there are plenty of instances where people have no say in the matter; they’re let go from their jobs or need to downsize or move back in with their families for financial support.)When clients do have a say but feel uncertain to jump, Stone tells them that even in the best of times, there’s no way to foresee how a decision will pan out.“What I always tell people is that one needs to carefully examine the decision but also accept that we will never know with 100% certainty that it was the right decision until later on,” she said. “It’s only after that you can see with clarity if it was ultimately the right or wrong decision.”   Liz Higgins, a therapist in Dallas who primarily works with millennials, said many clients are considering weighty relationship decisions ― whether to stay or go, or whether to take a healthy relationship to the next level.Her advice to them is pretty simple: If you’re feeling an internal sense of peace, reciprocal respect and solid communication flowing with your partner, go for it, regardless of the pandemic. (And on the flip side of the coin, if you can’t recognise any of that in your relationship, it may be time to leave.)“Just because this is a trying time doesn’t mean it’s not the right time to move forward with bigger life decisions,” Higgins said. For all the stress inherent in a pandemic, you still have agency and the ability to make smart decisions once you’ve examined both sides.“I have seen couples navigate deciding to get pregnant, buying a home, proceeding with their wedding celebrations in drastically different ways, and the way they are able to do this in a healthy way is by taking extra care of the health of their relationship, checking in with each other, and maintaining time for transparent, rational conversation about their lives and their expectations,” she said.Here’s how to know if you should hold off on making any pandemic-pegged decisions.When might you want to press “pause” on a decision till after the pandemic is a little more under control?If you think you might mistakenly be attributing your feelings about the pandemic to your current life choices, take a beat, said Gina Delucca, a psychologist at Wellspace SF in California. It’s been a year of discontent, so don’t be surprised if you’re feeling well, discontent.“The feelings you are having in response to the pandemic ― feelings of restlessness, sadness, loneliness or boredom ― are normal reactions to what you’re going through,” she said. “It doesn’t necessarily mean that something is wrong with your current life.”Besides that, don’t act if you haven’t fully examined your rational side and your emotional side, Stone said.“They need to align to be able to make a sound decision,” she said.Also hold off if you’re feeling any subtle peer pressure.“If several friends have moved or made big life decisions, you might feel pressured to do the same, but we need to remember what is right for one person may not be the same for another,” Stone said.Ask yourself these questions before making a big life decision.How do you know if you’re making a sound change or acting out of discomfort or uneasiness about pandemic? Ask yourself: “Am I moving toward something or away from something?” said Dara Bu Elliott, a life and career coach at Wellspace SF.“For example, it’s more sustainable to quit a job to take one that’s more aligned with your values and your vision for your life than to quit to escape a sense of restlessness and boredom,” she said.Jess Davis, an associate marriage and family therapist at Wellspace SF, shared a short list of questions that also might help determine if your big life change is the right call:Do you have a pattern for impulsive decision-making?Was this major life change on your radar pre-pandemic? If so, has anything in your environment made it easier or harder to make the change?Have you meditated, journaled or spent intentional time in deep reflection of your desired outcome for the change?Do you have supportive relationships and a self-care practice to help strengthen your well-being during a transition?In the end, major life changes are highly personal and circumstantial, Davis said. You’re the expert on you, and only you can decide what the best course of action is.“After all, you’re the one that has to live with any decision,” Davis said. “What you can do is take an honest inventory of the motivation behind the desired change and then take it from there.”Related...9 Signs You're Ready To Quit Your JobHow To Get Your 'Spark' Back If You've Completely Lost Your MojoHow To Break Out Of A Pandemic Rut In Your RelationshipHow To Boost Your Energy When You're Just So Effing Tired
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For many of us home has become not just the place we live and sleep, but the place we work and spend most of our social time. And as our homes become multi-functional, with families and housemates using the space at the same time, it’s easy to let things get little... disorganised.A little mess might seem harmless, but it has been linked to lower mood, stress and lack of focus. So get ahead and plan your spring clean.Clutter means different things for different people. “Clutter is anything that gets in the way of you getting on with your everyday tasks in life,” explains Sue Spencer, a professional organiser and founder A Life More Organised. Perhaps the washing drying in your new makeshift office is affecting your focus or the toys in the living room are stopping you from relaxing after the kids have gone to bed.There are many reasons that clutter can get out of control. For starters, life is busy. “It’s very rare that we stop and put aside time to look at all the stuff we have around our homes and make decisions about what we keep and let go of,” explains Spencer.For Lee Chambers, an environmental psychologist and wellbeing consultant, clutter is inevitable given the society we live in. “We exist in a disposable consumer culture, where we are bombarded with the latest possessions worth acquiring, marketing tailored to our preferences and designed to influence our behaviours.” Chambers says. What’s more, the value placed on possessions makes them hard to clear out: “We attach value to many of the items we own, from sentiment and experience to value and identity. We can find it challenging to let go of many things for various reasons.”But it’s important to look at ways to declutter if mess and disorder are impacting your mind. Chambers tells HuffPost that clutter can affect our mental health in various ways from our anxiety to sleep quality and even our attention. “It can also impact our productivity levels, trigger avoidance strategy and impact what we consume. Clutter has a cumulative effect on our minds, increasing the potential of cognitive overload and reducing our resources, and causes elevated cortisol levels. This increases the likelihood of feeling overwhelmed, having a lower mood, and worried,” he adds.Moreover, with time, clutter can affect the way we function as it affects our cognitive abilities and physiology. Chambers says: “In a cluttered environment, we have more information to process, visual reminders of our disorganised environment, which continually distracts us as we live in space.” This can become an issue when we’re trying to focus on another task as clutter distracts us from processing information and getting into a state of flow. “It can also impact our emotional balance by affecting our sleep, which can impact our communication with others and our overall feelings daily,” Lee adds.Convinced? Now’s the time start planning that clear out.Spencer is one of a handful of the KonMari™ Consultants in the UK who have trained with decluttering queen Marie Kondo. The celebrated method focuses on decluttering and organising your home in a way that supports your everyday and future life. “Having a view of how you’d like to live your life moving forward and what ‘sparks joy’ (things you love) really helps you to create this environment,” she adds. And it’s not something you have to do alone: involving those you live with, should help lighten the load and ease decision making – especially if you get your children involved. Remember lots of the things you may no longer want can be donated. Once you’ve got rid of everything you no longer want you can get started on finding a home for each item – this should be easier now you have more space. Be sure you don’t run out of steam in this phase, it might be worth doing it in stages or early on a weekend morning – whenever you know you’ll have more uninterrupted time and energy.After going through a clear out, your mind and space will feel renewed but the process isn’t easy. It’s normal to feel overwhelmed by the number of things you have so it’s imperative to make some sort of plan before you begin your clearout journey. Chambers believes we should have clear boundaries and take pictures of space uncluttered as a point of reference. “If you find yourself struggling in the process, there is professional help available, and it certainly helps to involve others as support in the process,” he says. Think about how you can make the process easy by considering storage spaces and make most of the space you do have. Clearouts require a huge amount of effort but your wellbeing will thank you for it later.
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A year into the pandemic, it’s completely normal for all motivation to have slipped out of the window and to have fallen into a new routine of eat, sleep, Netflix, repeat. But with the current situation stretching longer than many of us ever imagined, taking charge of a few things in our lives might help us feel like we have a bit more control – whether that’s learning a new skill or exploring that business venture you’ve always dreamed of.Joanna Mallon, career coach and author, says experiencing a lack of drive at a time like this is very common. Fortunately her book, ‘Change Your Life in 5 Minutes a Day: Inspiring Ideas to Vitalize Your Life Every Day’, argues that taking control doesn’t need to be a huge undertaking. It’s all about switching to a more proactive mindset, rather than a predominantly passive one. “A passive thinker lets the world happen to them and deals with changes as they occur, whilst a proactive thinker will take steps to create the changes they want to happen,” Mallon tells HuffPost UK. “A passive person will take the life they’re given whereas a proactive person will take action to create the life they want.”Environmental psychologist and wellbeing consultant Lee Chambers agrees, adding: “Proactive thinking is all about being flexible and agile and seeing the interconnected elements of life and creating a dynamic plan.” The difference between being a passive and proactive thinker is knowing how to respond to situations by analysing them rather than allowing our thoughts to take over us.  So how can we start not just seizing opportunities but creating them for ourselves? Chambers recommends drawing up a list of proactive questions to ask yourself to help you evaluate possible next steps. “These questions can identify where you are currently at and look at with clarity at a plan, such as ‘What do I need to do to feel fulfilled in the short-term and the long-term?’” he says. Other options could be: What am I passionate about? Do I have contacts who might be able to collaborate with me?Make sure you spend enough time on this, after all, time is all we have at the moment. Why not start the exercise and then return to it again a day or two later to reflect on your answers. “With this clarity, it’s essential to analyse what you might need to change and look at how your expectations might cause you to react,” he says. He recommends giving yourself a few options to compare so that you feel empowered with your choices.Mallon also encourages reflection. You need to look at what factors might be at play at making you feel the way, beyond the pandemic: “It may come from fear of moving forward in your life or from having set the wrong goals that you’re just not excited enough about.” A helpful tip in working out what you are passionate about is to spend some time thinking about the opposite: for this Mallon recommends creating a ‘To Don’t’ list to help you prioritise.If you’re stuck, Chambers recommends spending some time outside alone to reflect and jumpstart your creative imagination. “Getting outside is vital for our proactivity, whether it be tending to plants ready for spring, having the icy air hitting your cheeks, or walking around the block as a commute.”Practicing proactive thinking isn’t just necessary for achieving big goals. If these feel daunting, start small. “This is the time to try and get creative, and you can do this by finding a hobby,” says Chambers. “Think about trying new things and learning new skills, without the expectation that you will be amazing.”Whether large or small, taking back control can lead to greater satisfaction in life. Chambers says: “You start to create your own future by having options and feeling more in control of your own destiny.”
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Using an preliminary school with an experienced facilitator or teacher allows for a gentler opening to these new some ideas and a far more satisfying experience.There are many lessons and classes of examine in relation to the philosophy of A Program in Wonders, and actually unique courses on critical Course methods, such as for instance True Forgiveness or Cause and Effect.Such lessons provide students the opportunity to experience the theory and program of certain material more deeply.Through such serious knowledge, many students find the confidence of internal peace and the pleasure of understanding the Inner Teacher.Forget about specific classes are assigned, for there is no longer require of them.Henceforth, hear nevertheless the Voice for God...He'll strong your attempts, suggesting exactly what direction to go, just how to direct your brain, and when to come to Him alone, asking for His sure way and His certain Word (Workbook, p. 487).Over 40 years ago, a psychologist from Columbia University started initially to route revelations from the spiritual entity that she was convinced was Jesus himself.
Crystalmind Online therapy platform is the best online counseling platform in india.the platform features over 100 counselors  over 60 psychologists and psychologists from india.Current scenario of pademic is very much created demad  for  Online therapy systems.Online counseling is performed via video conference or voice calls or chats.zoom, jitsi and other thrid pary applications can be used for this purpose.Crystalmind chooses zoom as its video conference application.It is easy to integrate it is worpress plugin avialable plus it is very secure to use.Crystalmind features profiles of cousnelors psychologists and other therapists on its therapist page.clients eighter select their therapist or crystalmind selects therapist after discussing with clients.Then booking for session is done simulenously  payment is completed through payment gateway.The paltform is developed and maintained by Maestrosoft INTERNET TECCHNOLOGIES crystalmind online counseling  online psychologist online therapy online wellness coaching 
Nikita Barretto is a qualified psychologist that specialises in adolescence, adult, and couple’s therapy.The expert provides a wide range of services including adolescent counselling, cognitive-behavioural therapy, marriage counselling, and many others.To know more about Nikita Barretto and its wide range of services.
Nikita Barretto is a qualified psychologist that specialises in adolescence, adult, and couple’s therapy.The expert provides a wide range of services including adolescent counselling, cognitive-behavioural therapy, marriage counselling, and many others.To know more about Nikita Barretto and its wide range of services.
Nikita Barretto is a qualified psychologist that specialises in adolescence, adult, and couple’s therapy.The expert provides a wide range of services including adolescent counselling, cognitive-behavioural therapy, marriage counselling, and many others.To know more about Nikita Barretto and its wide range of services.
 Nikita Barretto is one of the best clinical psychologists in Dubai that passionate about its work and has a recovery-oriented method of working with people.The skilled professional provides different types of services including therapy, assessments, workshops, training, and many others for individuals.For more information visit us on: https://uaeplusplus.com/pages/RegisterNew/CompanyRegistered.aspx 
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